Tuesday, January 06, 2009

morals of fighting

I had a fight.

Having a sister who is around my age, I grew up learning that strategically placed bites could overturn the result of a scuffle and that hair yanks only work on girls. As we grew older, we learnt that linguistics make good armaments and that body language works better than scratching. (Fear not, the said fight is not between her and me.)

Personally, I dislike fights. My first response as a toddler was to cry and run away. This persisted into early primary school life, when one afternoon my exasperated mother said that if people hit me then it solves no problem if what I did was yelp for her - so I should hit them back (for everyone's sake I say now that I am no fan of retaliation and this sort of response does not apply to many cases when one is violated or victimised!) Well it is pretty clear now that I don't like scuffles, both physical and mental.

Sometimes, it feels like there is more than enough on my proverbial life-plate to deal with and I would lash out (complete with difficult words and all) on unfavourable injustices done onto me. I don't like lashing out, and I don't like how it makes me feel throughout the process, but when I have managed myself and expressed myself clearly I can be quite happy to have had a good fight. A fight where both sides can clearly communicate "you wronged me", "you're wrong", and sometimes "I hope you &*$#^¢£¥¿§!!" (although clearly not preferred for possible undoable mistake done with minimal actual progress achieved.)

But yeah, I just had one such fight. We've each stated our own points, had our disagreements, and think of the other as dickhead. And then we make up.

And I'm happy with it.

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