(sleepless nights)

It's 1:34AM, and I'm still awake, even though I have to be at uni tomorrow morning... by 8:30AM.

The whole course completion, graduation, conferring ceremony, sponsorships, Kanooka and PR paperworks are like a whirlwind. It felt weird to be here, ... just weird. Can't explain how I am supposed to burrow my nose into books for a second time around. This time around, I can definitely say O-week hosts are one of the most helpful people during your transition period!

PK is also another issue for this new semester/academic year. Previously, I have always thought I would certainly pledge myself to Melb Uni. On the other hand, PK in Deakin might be a good idea. For sure, in Semester 1 efforts will be devoted to Melb Uni since Poss is leaving and Yaki will essentially be a single fighter. However, I haven't quite worked out what to do for Semester 2.

Sometimes I wonder, life is like a never-ending journey. It has an end, a distant one though. When we had open table in Melb Uni, it was like a dream come true, and was partly like a honeymoon in the sense that I was thinking, "Phew, we are here at last!" (The pictures are stuck on my Friendster profile's photo album.) However, when PK Deakin was mentioned, I was excited at the prospects as well. It would probably be another battlefield full of mines.

Which in a sense tells me this: there is no honeymoon in PK.

Graduation-wise... I'm struggling to get a spot for four, including myself, for this Saturday's graduation. It would probably a historic and funny day at the same time. Can't imagine me putting on a toga and posing "classically" the way graduates' pictures are usually taken. I'm hoping I won't smirk ^^;

Tata's bday is on Thursday.

Alright, it's late at night, and I need to go to bed even though the heat's unbearable. Air-con is a privilege. Take care, and good night!

Elevation

There is actually little story to be put in this blog.

My BComm exams are all done for, and I'm waiting for the results to be published. As simple as every normal student would ask, I would like to graduate. Soon. NOW. That seems like a big emphasis on instantaneous result, which is what I usually go against... and the very expectation I am having at this very moment. So much for idealism. Human nature is like an animal: it can be trained to behave well, but its wild nature cannot be changed.

On Tuesday (which was just yesterday - this feels more like a Tuesday night than a Wednesday dawn), I did hosting at uni. My group was really nice, and I also met this Indo girl who turned out to be Nad's junior in high school. This year I got to try to do backflips on trampolines, and also sumo wrestling. Yay! It was fun to do, although at some point creative thinking was required to transform my outfit into a more suitable one. The sumo wrestling was particularly memorable, with me and Sabrina trying to stand up while wearing a sumo costume that was bigger than ourselves. I also managed to drag Rez for backflips on trampolines; she was against it but I could not see enough reluctance in her participation. She claimed that she would kill me... which I think was a casual threat thrown at me while she was being thrown up in the air. The backflips were challenging (but fun) to master, and the front flips just HARD to do. It gave me a fresh perspective of adrenaline rush, with the wind blowing on my face and me half-floating in the air. I'll miss uni for sure ^^;

Some of the facilitators were having a good time as well. We managed to draw up a list of terms coined to refer a host's tenure at Melbourne O-Week... in years. This is the list, from the shortest to the longest:
New hosts i.e. first-timers (...we even marketed the hosting to some first-year students!)
Return hosts (been there once)
Veteran hosts (been there at least twice)
Old (been there three times)
Ancient (it's your fifth year doing it)
Prehistoric (anyone doing it for the sixth time, or when one has received a completed statement of results from student admin.)
By the time you get to 'prehistoric' level, you would have been there long enough to handle a Vet Science group when you're just doing... Engineering. Hehehe, no intentions to offend Eng people.

I also managed to collect a sizable loot from the O-Week giveaways: bags, balloons, shirts, bookroom vouchers, drinks, food coupons etc etc. The loot was not the main reason why I did hosting, though, and neither was it a substantial factor in decision-making.

Tata was also bugged quite a lot today (sorry! hehe but I hope you enjoyed it.) She had these cubes to finish. Oh, before I forget, need to send something off as well tomorrow. Soba was on my supper list as well, which is partly why I'm still here at such a late hour. I'm trying to contact an old friend. The reason being was to tease him endlessly about having a new girlfriend and keeping the news under cover. He owes me and Lia a banquet! Hehe. It was just we weren't expecting him to be in a relationship any time soon given his work responsibilities, we find it a suitable circumstance to make a good laugh out of it. I'm evil... hehehe... but we had this deal long ago, and a deal's a deal. Oh well, let's just wait and see.

Tomorrow is likely to be a quiet day, apart from open table preparations and doing Quickbooks. The residency issue is coming along well, although dissecting through paperwork for journal entries is not my favourite thing to do. I might have to go to the City for sponsorship arrangements... OK, I really have to go to the City to meet this guy for sponsorship arrangements. So I think tomorrow's pretty set. I need to go to bed now in order to have an early start for the day, and do as many journal entries as possible.

After all, the accountant's set for work.

Oh, I also got this offer for my resume to be passed on to a multinational's HR department. Not bad for a start. I must be careful, though, since my academic results are not what you will call splendid or even a worthy topic of discussion. Alright, that adds another item on my to-do list for tomorrow. Let's just reiterate it:
Quickbooks' entries
MidCity guy before lunch
Student admin for transcript
Plush at around lunch
Go to L'Epicier
Lonsdale St guy between 2-3PM
Upload PDF files
Set up the website (must finish Quickbooks early!)
Reply to the email nicely.

Alright, that's set for tomorrow to do. I hope that this coming job will be a good one, and a suitable one if I am accepted (keeping in mind the Mukuge project.) Good night, everybody. Take care!

Love, lift me out of these blues
Won't you tell me something true
I believe in you.

Always Be My Home

I've been eating a lot of junkfood lately - some of them are the Original Glazed Krispy Kreme doughnuts and home-made spiders. This isn't good! The good thing is that I save a lot. Uh oh, not really, I'm starting to spend a lot too (need to keep an eye on this :q)

Without taking the coming Sunday into consideration, this week is pretty blah to sum up. I'm just hoping that tomorrow/today will be a better day. Life is overwhelming. I submitted an application for special consideration and will probably seeing a doctor/psychiatrist person the day after tomorrow to substantiate my application. It's such a funny thing, submitting this, whereas I was supposed to be ready on Monday to meet my tutor and discuss past exam responses (this was my plan on Wednesday evening.) So much for stability. Time and events are fleeting.

With the heyday of Chinese Lunar New Year about to pass, I just want to write something about horoscopes. They are RUBBISH. If you believe them, you are getting trapped in self-fulfilling forecasts (when in fact you don't have to fulfil them.) I'm not encouraging anyone to believe in them even though you think it's okay to believe in good self-fulfilling forecasts; you will be self-fulfilling bad ones, too, at the same time. The future is like uncharted waters, and we the cartographers at the forefront of expedition. Hence do not be tempted to buy cheap and faulty forgeries of what is yet to be seen, you're wasting your time and heart.

I also don't believe in 14/2 (the coming Monday... ahem.) It's true you need to celebrate your love to others... but when you love others, you love them pretty much throughout the year(s)... not on occasions like 14/2, or your "dating anniversary". I found a lot of people neglect their other half and hope that being extra sweet on 14/2 will help mitigate/compensate for their lack of love. It's just a big, fat LIE! I'm not against people celebrating it, but remember that we should practise what we preach on 14/2. Don't get carried away in commercialisations done by the sweet tooth, floristry and jewellery industry (they milk a substantial amount from this occasion.)

Life's pretty messed up, especially with the intention of studying art. The walk is not an easy one. Further complicated by external expectations and pressures. He won't give a smooth road, but He's there for me. Thanks a lot! ^^

Alright, I'll try to finish up the paperworks for that DIMIA response, bid for some items at eBay, and go to bed. Wait, the bidding might come later, depending on the progress. I hope I can score a good sleep and not miss the bidding hehehe. What a bad shopper I am...

Take care and do not lose heart.

Your heart will always be my home
No matter where I go
No matter what may come
You'll be my shelter in the storm
A harbor safe and sound
Where only true forgiveness can be found

But still, I wanna run away
Go it all alone
When will I ever learn from my mistakes?

And I can't live without Your love
'Cause Your eyes have seen beyond
the things I'm guilty of
I won't be afraid
To turn back down the road
'Cause Your heart will always be my home

Experiment

Hypothetically speaking, what would you do when you are faced with a decision: preserve the artwork, or recycle it?

Uh oh. I had always been a fervent believer in artwork preservation. In my opinion, it is important to conserve artworks so that future generations will be able to see first-hand proof of how an individual lived in the society one was living in. The idea of salvaging artworks to be used for purposes other than the above-mentioned education seemed like an abomination.

Several days ago I came across an antique kimono auction at eBay (don't worry, I ended up not buying it.) Given uploaded pictures, the quality of fabric was spectacular, and it was reasonably priced given the amount of material to be received - some 3.5 metres of royal blue silk heavily embroidered with gold threads. It was in a good condition too, given its age (older than my grandma for sure.) Spiffy! But then what came to mind was, "Of course I wouldn't wear it as is. What about pulling it apart and making a modern outfit from the materials?"

That, my friend, was a dilemma. I believed in conservation but also understood that the materials would have little useful life left should they be left in the state they were in. I love experimenting, but once it is taken apart then it would be impossible to reverse the process done. Probably I would take something apart the next time I come across a gorgeous (yet highly unwearable) kimono, but not now. I'm kinda broke... and then again, I've got to go to class. Take care, and happy Lunar New Year for those who celebrate it! ^^

Experiment,
and you'll see.

The Way You Look At Me

Went to eat lunch at Garage Cafe today. The meal was reasonably priced and sized, which is good (Gandaria serves meagre portions at prices just under Garage Cafe's.) It was not top-class delicious either, but is good for a student's standards. Happy with it ^o^

Today was my first day playing tambourine again. It was good! ^^ It had been a while since I last practised and 'exercised', hence it felt a bit physical and tiring back then. We tried these new moves... which was hilariously FAST... then I slapped my pinky finger on the tambourine's edge!! Ouch that hurts a lot... and the joint looks like it's swollen now. Blue-ish shadow, really, and doesn't feel nice when pressed. This has happened a good couple of times (luckily not to often), but anyway hopefully it isn't a case of broken bones. Having demented fingers would look sick, I reckon. I won't get into the whole idea of testing of the 'sick finger' look though hahaha...

I also went to check out the umbrella people's H/O down Faraday Street. It was a rather small office, but they have an interesting selection of sample umbrellas there!! Yay!! They all looked cute and/or cool, which made it hard to decide which one to choose from. Unfortunately, the owner guy came into scene and told me I couldn't get any of them away from the H/O regardless of whether I pay for it or not. Company secrets, I guess :p If that didn't work then I might have to convince him by applying for work at his place hahaha... this whole umbrella obsession is getting hilarious by day.

It was weird Pets Paradise no longer stock dog jumpers; the girls in Melbourne Central referred me to Collar and Bone. This other store sells upmarket dog wares and stocks minuscule sizes for pet dogs commonly kept by Asians in apartments... sigh... nothing wearable for Bandit on a daily basis. There were dog back-packs but they would not be comfy enough for him to live in. The buckles, argh!! Just hoping that all these people get their common sense back and realise there are people out there who own Afghan hounds, greyhounds or even a vizla. Hey, a vizla would be cool ^^

The university bookroom stocks these Oxford dictionnaries (20-odd volumes of them) and a shorter version. Well, two is still less than twenty.

Alright, that is it for today. My body's creaking; need to do personal hygiene routine (brush teeth, wash face, put moisturiser... alright, the moisturiser bit is not strictly personal hygiene but still necessary.) Will wake up early tomorrow morning to finish up a mental pile of to-dos. Oh, lastly, I'm adoring this exotic peacock furisode. It's simply spectacular ^o^ but buying a kimono entails other hidden costs too, like buying jyuban, obi, obijime, kanzashi (if I were feeling fancy), tabi, zori and a whole heap of other stuff. And that was not an exhaustive list...

This is not an excuse, but I'm quite proud with my piggy bank, although today's tally was meagre. Dhami's green tea milkshake is turning into one milky slush!! The taste was indiscernible. Mental note: buy green tea milkshake from Samurai instead (which involves a 30-minute trip on foot.)

Going for beauty sleep and dreaming on the furisode hahaha...

'Cause there's something in the way you look at me
It's as if my heart knows you're the missing piece
You made me believe that there's nothing in this world I can't be
I never know what you see
But there's somethin' in the way you look at me

Little by Little

Today was exceptional.

It all started a couple of days ago (was it last week?) Marsha went to sleep at some ungodly hour the previous night, woke up late for class, and was late for the bang-on-time tram service she was supposed to take. Consequently she took a later service and ended up stranded on the Royal Parade roundabout some half-hour after the lecture started - there was no Route 19 trams. After waiting for a good couple of minutes, she decided the sun was not going to make much of an inconvenience given that the tram shelter was made from glass anyway, and left for the main campus block on foot. Not willing to spend an extra minute under the sun, she walked down a sleepy side road, on where she saw a newly-opened restaurant encased by an old (yet renovated) garage. A new one, she thought, which I will pay a visit to if I had the time. She did pay a visit today, and went away with much more in her hands than what she could have imagined a week ago.

A lot of people know I stutter when I talk, accentuated by mumbles and worsened by a breakneck speech speed. Yeah right, tell me I'm a smooth-talking melancholic girl. When I first started working in retail, I had to be shoved onto customers before making any verbal contact with them. Today, I gave a swift look to the restaurant with dilated pupils, an obvious sign I was feeling lost... and downright scared. To cut things short, three hours later I walked away in a daze, trying to replay what had just happened before her eyes. He was with me all the time I was in there.

I am quite concerned with my summer subjects. Even though they are second-year subject and I did well in HRM's first assignment (culminating in the rare occasion of my marks being better than Dd's), it does not guarantee I will get flying colours for the final results. In less than 40 hours two assignments will be due by electronic submission, which saves travelling time but still is not an awful lot of extra time. I am in a state of mental blankness.

Saving money in a piggy bank can be quite enjoyable. I have to admit to enjoying those chink-chink noise when you pop your coins into it. Unfortunately I lost track of where today's remaining coins are, hence I banked very little. Hopefully I won't revert back to the stingy Marsha I used to be when I was little (who had a relatively sizable nest-egg in her piggy bank.) It is quite hard, especially with the greenback's weakness and Apple's latest release: iShuffle. It basically works like an MP3 player/USB pen drive, sans the display and the AAA battery. Its capacity is acceptable at a respectable 1GB (it's also released in a 512MB version.) Alright, enough promotion here.

I was overjoyed at 'getting rid' of Revenge Guy. Well, I was proven wrong - the euphoria was broken by my mobile phone, declaring a message received. Gah .\/. am I being too subtle with the selection of words and my own conduct? No! <6__-;> Stop it!!!

Oh well, I'm going back to my assignment. So unmotivated... but let's get through this anyway!

Little by little, day by day
Little by little, in every way
My Jesus is changing me
As I look upon His face
He is changing me by His grace
My Jesus is changing me

He's changing me, my blessed Saviour
I'm not the same old person that I used to be
Although it's slow going
still, there's knowing
That one day, like Him I shall be.